Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor. – Alexis Carrell (France, 1873 – 1944)

In conjunction, the fourth operation in alchemy, you’re putting all the pieces back together from the previous alchemical processes. What was washed away from separation is gone forever, and all that remains are the golden nuggets of your authentic self. In conjunction, you’re melding these pieces of you together. You’re telling the universe, “These is me, authentically.”

Stick to the end for a fun visualization meditation where you’ll come face-to-face with art and mirrors in a museum.

Why It’s VITAL for You to Put Your “Real Self” Out There.

I remember reading an article a few years back written by a woman who worked with the dying. Bonnie Ware was an Australian palliative care nurse who took care of patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives.

She would make them as comfortable as possible, talk with them, listen to their stories, and watched as they prepared themselves mentally to die. She was witness to the many stages people went through – like denial, fear, anger – until finally, each one of them made peace with their inevitable death.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth.” – Bonnie Ware

As she sat with them, talking with them and listening to their stories, she heard people speak more honestly and more authentically than they ever had before.

They spoke from the bottom of their hearts, from the place of their souls, about what they WISH they could have done differently if they were given the chance to do it all over again.

Bonnie learned that in these final hours, recurring themes about regret would keep popping up with her patients. These regrets have been written over and over again from others in the health care field, but Bonnie’s article, the 5 Biggest Regrets of the Dying remains the catalyst for these powerful reflections of one’s life.

Sorry But, “I Wish I Had Made More Money” Doesn’t Make the List of Biggest Regrets.

The most common regrets of someone who is dying (from least importance to most important) are:

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

And finally, the most common regret:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

(Read those one more time.)

Isn’t this amazing?

Now to ask the obvious question:

If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, would you share any of these regrets?

Why Do You Do Things That Hold You Back? Milgram Says, “You Were Just Following Orders.”

If you find yourself saying, “But there’s nothing I can do. My life is already laid out. This is where I have to remain,” I want you to say out loud,

“Quiet now, Ego! I can do whatEVER I want!”

Remember: your ego protects you from anything that can be perceived as a threat or potentially painful. Ego loves you and wants the best for you, after all. But change – the kind that takes you from where you are to where you want to go – IS painful!

Change is the alchemical process from calcification to coagulation.

Change comes from the series of events you work through to dissolve false beliefs that hold you back from pursuing your heart’s intent!

But SO many times you are stifled from living authentically. When you become conscious of it, know you have the power to change course.

Let’s look at an example with more academic merit.

The Milgram Experiment

In a controversial social experiment, a Yale University psychology professor studied how people reacted when authority figures give them tasks to do, even if it went against personal conscience. Subjects were asked by these figures to send a 400-vault electrical shock to another person.

It was found that more than 60% of people felt remorse for what they had done. No matter how horrific the act was, the subjects felt that they were “just following orders,” thus lessening their guilt.

You can watch a short video about the Milgram Experiment here.

This experiment demonstrates how people are programmed to suppress their own thinking and free will for someone who is perceived to be in a higher status, better social class, or some other type of authority.

Although this is an extreme example, you may find that there have been times in your life when you’ve completely rolled over for someone when you knew you shouldn’t have…and you are the one who ends up paying for it.

Think about it:

  • Every time you suppress your own feelings, you make it harder for your own intuition to come through.
  • Every time you follow someone else’s orders, you make it harder for your own thinking to come through.
  • Every time you ignore your own gut instinct, you extinguish your own passion and become more and more complacent.

Living a suppressed life is not your soul mission. Avoid dying with regret by living in your truth.

Accept All Parts Of Yourself.

Conjunction is the stage for you to accept all the parts of yourself that make you, you.

You are your own person, who will THRIVE once you accept yourself.

That’s all it takes. Acceptance.

Become aware of who you are in this moment. You’ve got a lot of time ahead of you.

Learn to perceive yourself with more acceptance and love. Welcome solitude during this time.

The important thing is to fall in love with you again. When you can do that, you can manifest anything into existence.

Feeling like all is coming together and satisfaction from this union brings balance and unconditional love to your world.

Visualization: Museum of Art and Mirrors

This visualization meditation will explore the parts of you that feel real, authentic, and will reveal what will give you the happiest life during your time on this earth.

Before we begin:

  • Set aside 20-30 minutes
  • Find a safe place where you won’t be interrupted
  • Bring a journal and pen
  • Find some calm music you can get lost in

When you’re ready, get yourself in a comfortable position and close your eyes.

Breathe normally as you calm your body.

You are about to travel into the deepest part of your heart for a loving self-discovery.

When you feel relaxed, take a deep, cleansing breath in through your nose and out through your mouth.

Make sure to extend your belly as you pull your breath in as deep as you can.

You’re going to do 5 deep breaths and 5 stabilizing breaths.

And counting down…

10. Breathe in a white light that fills you with joy and breathe out anything that does not serve you.

9. Breathe in a white light that warms your belly and activates your imagination and breathe out self-doubt.

8. Breathe in and fill your body with a protective white light that gives you strength. Breathe out any resentment still lingering in your belly.

7. Breathe in your white light again and pull in the loving energy of your space. Breathe out false expectations you carry from your environment.

6. Breathe in your white light one more time and feel the warmth of your protection all around you. Breathe out and know that nothing that no longer serves you will be able to penetrate this space.

5. You can even out your breath now. Imagine your breath now draws in a golden light, filling your entire being. Feel the heat filling your belly.

4. Breathe normally. Imagine the golden light that you’re breathing in rests in your belly, forming a golden egg.

3. Breathe normally. Imagine the golden egg cracks open and sends vapors up your belly, up your chest, and up into your head.

2. Breathe normally. The vapors are opening your mind so you can see more clearly.

1. Breathe normally. You are filled with divine light and are protected.

Stay in this space for a moment. Feel the vapor in your head, the heat in your belly, the ground beneath you, the air around you. Everything is electrified!

When you’re ready, imagine you are on a walking path at a park. Take notice of your surroundings.

The park extends all around you for miles and miles. There is grass as far as the eye can see. There are a few shrubs and trees lined up alongside the walking path, but mostly what you see is grass, and sky.

Start walking forward.

As you keep walking you notice a building in the distance. It is round and erect, but no bigger than your library.

It’s a museum.

Walk toward it, until you get to the front door.

Pause for a moment. Look down at your side and you will notice an animal who has been following you. (What kind of animal is it?)

Take your hand on the door handle and push it open.

All around you are real paintings — colorful and made from the heart.

Go to the first one that draws you.

When you’re standing in front of one, study it.

What is it a picture of? What colors do you see? Are there people in it? Is there a scene?

Stay at this picture until you see an image.

Once you have your image, move on to the other side of the museum.

On the other side, you see mirrors.

Walk to the mirror that draws you.

When you are at your mirror, pay attention to it.

What is the shape of the mirror? How big is it? Is it in plain sight, or hidden? 

When you look in the mirror, you see yourself.

But, you look different than you remember from this morning.

What is different about you in this reflection?

Stay here for a moment.

Your animal comes to your side and gives you a nudge on your thigh. There is one piece of art it wants you to see.

Your animal guides you to the center of the museum, where there is a large masterpiece painting, hidden behind a velvet red curtain.

Your animal motions for you to pull the draw string and reveal what’s behind the curtain.

You grab the drawstring, and you pull.

You reveal a beautiful image of the perfect day.

What do you see? Who is in the picture? What is the scenery like?

Take a moment to be here. Notice how this piece of artwork makes you feel.

Feel a grin on your face.

Feel the joy in your heart.

Stay here for just a moment longer.

When it’s time to go, your animal comes to your side and nudges you again.

You both walk out of the museum.

Your animal scurries off the walking path and into the evening sundown.

You walk away from the museum, with the memories of these images.

As you walk away from the museum, you can slowly allow yourself to come out of your trance.

When you come out of it, write down what you learned from your masterpieces and mirrors.

I hope this served you well.



Lady Alchemy